To protect the health of your partners and prevent you from getting an STI again, we encourage you to tell all your partners.

Self-disclosure is the act of sharing with sex partners about a recent diagnosis with an STI or HIV, and how they might have been exposed. Self-disclosing may feel personal or vulnerable. But self-disclosing can be empowering, honest, and helps your sex partners get the care that they might need as well.

There are two ways self-disclose:

  1. Talking with your sex partners directly
  2. Sending your sex partners an anonymous text message with TellYourPartner.org

The best method is the method that is most comfortable for you. Each one shows that you care about protecting your partners’ health and want to stop the spread of STIs or HIV in your community.

Talking with your partners

Talking to your partners about a recent diagnosis, or self-disclosing, will help them access STI testing and treatment as soon as possible.

Here are some tips on talking with your partners/self-disclosing:

  • Share when you’re ready, comfortable, and in a safe space.
  • Practice what you will say in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend.
  • Learn more about your diagnosis to feel confident sharing information about it to your partner: STI Basics
  • Direct partners to testing sites such as the SF City Clinic or another location that is more convenient.
    • The SF City Clinic offers free testing and treatment with drop-ins and appointments.
    • Follow this link to a list of other locations that can be more convenient: GetTested
  • Share other resources available to them such as PEP, PrEP, and doxy-PEP.

Here is a video with an example of what it can be like to talk with your partner

Using TellYourPartner.org

TellYourPartner.org is a FREE, ANONYMOUS online service that can send a text message to your partners notifying them of a recent contact to an STI or HIV.

Learn more on how this service works.

How to use TellYourPartner.org (available in English and Spanish)

  1. Click the link to open the website
  2. Click the rectangle box “Send a Text”
  3. Move through the 5 steps to get started. This is where you will provide your partner’s cell phone number, select the STI you were diagnosed with, and then send the anonymous message.